Shadow in the Corner

December 24, 2008

I was once a shadow that lay deep in the heart of the darkness. There was no hope for me.

When light came I would follow the body that I was enslaved to obey. For unlike that body, there was nothing to me. I was inexistent. But I was always there.

When darkness approached I would fear the worst. For I knew each time, it could’ve been my end. It would come and cover me in my shame, and disgrace. Whispering taunts of worthlessness to me.

At first it had claimed to be helping me. But eventually it had robbed me of everything I had.

The light would always come again, but always with the promise of leaving.

My hope for the future was gone. Because for me, there was no future.

The devils of my past held firm their grip on me with chains for reminders. They’d yank on them and haunt me with their chuckles of satisfaction, as my shadowy figure cried out inside.

One night there came a streak of Light that crept into my dark corner. I crawled towards it inching closer and closer, in my desperate desire to be free. But the pain and anger that I had held onto for so long, help me back. More chains were added to me. More devils from my past consumed me. There was no hope.

But despite the fact that I was nothing, that little bit of Light touched something inside of me that made me think, perhaps there was a possibility to be free.

I yearned for that Light to come again. Just once more; To feel what I felt, just looking at it. I did not know what it was. But whatever it was, it was not like that other light.

I had heard a story about a God so loving, so merciful, so perfect. But in His perfection He could not be near me. But He’d cry in pain as He watched us. He loved us so much. He came down as a man to die for us. So that despite His perfection, He could be near us.

For years I waited for the Light to return. I dared not look for it.

Then as I slept one night covered in darkness, He called out to me, and I awoke to find that same streak of Light fighting it’s way through the darkness.  All I was, pulled towards It. But I did not budge. I said inside of me, “If it is true that He loves me. Let Him come and fetch me Himself.”

His voice kept calling to me, urging me to follow. But I did not forget my chains…

The Light began to shrink away once again, I wanted to shout out, “No! No! Don’t go!” But without a mouth, I could not.

I rose to my shadowy feet and began to run towards that Light. Forgetting my chains at last they tripped me; And the devils that claimed me, whipped me, and burnt me! Scaring me with marks of pain. Eventually something inside of me screamed out!

“JESUS!!!”

And that Light, that one streak of Light burst forth, filling the entire room!

I was not only set free that day, I was saved.

Jesus Christ, will not force Himself on you. He gives you the choice. He gives you your freedom.

We have given evil a body, and we have let hate swallow us up.

How long will you wait before you realize, you need Him just as much as I do?

With Love,

Christian soldier

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